Disappointments and the fear of disappointment close our mind to enjoyment of the present. When we worry about the ‘what if’ or face life with a pessimistic attitude then we risk losing the fun of truly living and experiencing the present moment. Maybe you were disappointed in the past, or you won’t take a risk for fear of being disappointed, but this is limiting your future options. To quote Mark Twain ‘some of my biggest disappointments never happened’.
Anxiety is often more about the anticipation of disappointment, distrusting life and facing the world with fear and a closed mind. People are scared to try yoga because they are scared of being disappointed by their body, by comparison to others or by the their progress. However as I have learnt…instead yoga can teach you to accept disappointment in day to day life and enjoy living more in the moment rather than being anxious about the result or the future.
Yoga practice allows you to be absorbed in the moment and to learn to accept disappointment. Your practice is different every time, and as yogis we learn to accept the disappointment that the joy of a particular posture in our last practice eludes us in this one, or that your body just doesn’t feel as comfortable or as at ease as yesterday. However each practice is a learning experience. It is exactly that; ‘practice’…not about achieving a goal but about enjoying the journey. Disappointment will affect us more if we are goal orientated, but if we learn to enjoy each experience for itself, without looking back or forward then we have learnt the joy of living in the moment. During your yoga practice you can observe your mind wanting your body to achieve, then becoming frustrated or disappointed if it can’t. This disappointment and frustration then tightens the mind and can be felt to tighten the body as posture changes and muscles become tense rather than relaxing. You can either accept this as the way you practice or consciously embrace your limitations as challenges and personal journeys of discovery. Trusting in your ability to let go and release in order to enjoy the posture.
In class I will try and explain how the exhale allows us to let go, to release and feel an internal stillness. Trusting in your breath as a way to explore your personal practice also allows us to take lessons off the mat and into our daily life. It is fear of disappointment or of failing to achieve goals that often holds us in negative lifestyle choices or postural habits. Learning to stay present and work with the breath will provide an internal strength to withstand the emotional pull of small disappointments. In everybody’s life are circumstances which require an internal strength and resilience. This could be a large disappointment, a loss or the stress of work, and through yoga practice you will find a greater ability to open to the experience. To stay present and almost observe the effect on your mind, body and breath. Accepting that it is by contracting mind and body into our disappointment that we create our own unhappiness. Like a plant is shaped by its environment, we grow, flourish and are shaped by our experience. Rather than limit our experiences because we are scared of being disappointed or not achieving our goals…enjoy the experience for what it is. Enjoy the postures that you find challenging, appreciate the small joys in life and don’t be scared of disappointment. Sometimes the small complications in life are what allow us to enjoy the peaceful times even more.